


we thought that we were young

by crickets



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-22
Updated: 2015-12-22
Packaged: 2018-05-08 11:09:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,368
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5494982
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crickets/pseuds/crickets
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>set post season 2</p>
            </blockquote>





	we thought that we were young

**Author's Note:**

  * For [stainofmylove](https://archiveofourown.org/users/stainofmylove/gifts).



When Clarke doesn't come back, it's not like Bellamy doesn't keep checking the horizon. 

_But sometimes..._ he looks away. 

It's in those moments that Raven's there, with some snarky comment and hobbling around like a chicken with her head cut off because she's trying to ignore the fact that Wick hasn't been around in a while, and rumor around Camp Jaha is that he's got his eyes on someone else these days.

Bellamy doesn't catch the joke, but he laughs anyway, obviously only half listening, obviously an afterthought. 

Raven rolls her eyes and tosses him a mess of tangled wires. 

"Just... do something with that, would you?" 

-

For just a minute, barely even a blink of existence, they were the Ark's last hope. 

Now they're just some screwed up kids trying to make sense of what they've been through.

_What they've done._

Raven can hardly remember the kind of reckless thinking that sent her crashing down to Earth in that antique tin can. It's the same kind of thinking that made Bellamy do what he did. 

_Love._

Well, that... and the fact that they're total idiots.

_Worked out though, didn't it?_

For the most part. 

-

She watches Bellamy's face, lit by the fire. And he's watching Lincoln and Octavia, huddled together, sharing a blanket and a tin cup that's filled to the brim with something that makes their cheeks warm and their laughter deep. 

Sometimes it's so easy to forget, to just live in the moment and be young and well fed and on Earth and alive. 

_And for that to be enough._

There's a scuffle just behind them, and it's Jasper shouting incoherently, and Monty on his heels, pleading with him. Jasper's got a torch, and he's thundering, as much as a fellow so slight can thunder, straight toward the fire. Bellamy's up in a flash, tackling Jasper to the ground, holding him down. The torch skitters across the dirt, landing at Raven's feet. 

Bellamy makes eye contact with her, and she nods.

Monty's angry and Raven offers a curt, "We've got this," and sends him off. 

Monty spits back at Jasper, both Raven and Bellamy helping him up now, "You're not the only one who went through something, dick!" 

"Monty," it's Octavia this time, her voice a warning. "Go." 

-

"Monty's right," Raven says when Bellamy comes out of Jasper's quarters. And then, an afterthought, "Is Jasper okay?"

Bellamy nods. "He's fine. He's sleeping. What's Monty right about, now?"

"Jasper." She's angry, but her voice doesn't rise above a whisper. "He's not the only one that went through something. He doesn't just get to lose his shit all the goddamn time while the rest of us carry on. He's not the only one who..."

"Lost someone?" Bellamy finishes. 

The words fall like a hammer, truth and silence hovering between them in the aftermath, but after a few seconds, just outside, they can hear the party picking back up again. 

_And the world spins madly on._

"Yeah," she exhales.

Bellamy thinks of his mom. He thinks of a young bright eyed girl who hid in the floor and grew up to be a warrior. He thinks of Finn and Clarke and all of those people in the mountain. The innocent ones. _The guilty..._

"Some of us are just stronger than others," he says.

Raven's eyes cloud over. "Are we?"

-

They've never really talked about the thing between them. After what happened with Finn and the veritable genocide of Mount Weather, that all seems like a lifetime ago. 

_Fuck_ , that _was_ a lifetime ago. 

She stays with him that night. After the fire burns out and everyone scatters, she follows him back to his bunk. 

"Hey," she says, "remember when life was simple and we all lived in space?"

Bellamy grins. "No," he says. "I don't." 

Raven curls next to him, and it's comfortable and she wants to kiss him but she doesn't. 

"Liar." 

He's warm and his arms are strong and there's a tension there because he was her first after Finn and she's definitely, definitely feeling it.... the pull. 

But she's tired and his bed, though identical, is somehow so much more comfortable than hers and her eyes just won't stay open.

She feels his lips at her temple, and then nothing else.

\- 

In the morning, and the days following, things are different. 

Different because now Bellamy is always around, like her shadow or her conjoined twin, with in-jokes and shared meals and stealing food off of each others plates. She'd go so far as to say that they're attached at the hip. except they're not attached. Not at all, because Bellamy so painfully obviously will not touch her. Not even a little. Every time she gets close he backs away, pretends to be interested in a pile of batteries she's got stacked on the work bench, pretends to have to go check something in the armory. 

Finally, she gives up and corners him behind a storage unit. 

"What is your deal?"

Bellamy shrugs. "What deal?"

Raven's touching him now, forcefully pushing him back against the metal shelf. " _Your deal,_ " she offers in explanation. "Where's that 'I'm not that guy' guy?" She imitates his voice when she says it, and Bellamy suppresses a laugh.

"Something funny, Blake?" 

"Yeah," he says, his voice steady and grave. "Something's funny." 

And then he's kissing her and Raven pulls back just long enough to utter, "Fucking finally," and then his lips are on her again, a grin at the corners of his mouth. 

\- 

He's quiet. 

_After._

Raven's got her hands tangled in his across her belly, and she's tracing circles over his knuckles and she wonders what he's thinking about. 

"What are you thinking about?"

Bellamy's eyes flutter open.

After a pause, she offers. "Are you thinking about Clarke?"

Clarke and Bellamy were never _a thing_ exactly, but she can read between the lines. 

Bellamy shakes his head. 

"No," he says. "I'm not." 

Raven believes him. 

"Okay," she says. 

"Are you thinking about Finn?"

Raven grins slightly, sadly. "I mean... I'm always thinking about Finn. In one way or another," she admits. "But it's not like it means anything." 

"Of course it does," he says. And his voice sounds heavy, like he's about to fall asleep. 

What she means to say is that it doesn't mean anything because Finn is dead. Because Finn and her were over anyway, even before that. Because being with Bellamy is different. Because her and Finn were just kids playing house. Now, with everything she's been through? Nothing's 'just playing,' least of all this. 

Instead she says, "it does and it doesn't." 

Bellamy sighs. 

"I know what you mean." 

-

Octavia is tickled when she figures out what's going on. 

Not for any other reason than it gives her a chance to tease her brother, and it's been so long since she's done that, that she can barely remember how it works.

"So..." she says, and her voice has that _I know what's going on here_ tone to it. 

"So?" he's playing dumb, but she's not buying it. 

"Spill!" she demands.

"Don't you have some knives to sharpen somewhere?" he asks, and she shoves him on the shoulder. 

"Idiot! Talk."

He smiles and she doesn't need to know anymore. It's _that_ smile. The real one. The one that tells her everything she needs to know. 

"Oh my gosh!" she squeals, like she's just a lucky girl who got to go to a masquerade ball and not someone capable of taking a life. Not someone you'd be afraid to piss off. Not even a little. 

Bellamy rolls his eyes and his voice gets high, a blush on his cheeks. "Shut up." 

Turns out they're both regressing.

If only for a minute.

\- 

Sometime later, when this thing between them is no longer new, and no longer a one night stand revisited, and no longer a question, in either of their minds, Bellamy kisses her by the fire, in full view of everyone. 

Raven lets him.

Nobody cares. 

Nobody even blinks. 

Raven grabs his hand, pulling him away from the group. "C'mon..."

He follows. 

Just a couple of young, dumb kids. 

_Trying to forget._

It's as simple as that.

_-fin_


End file.
